Dispirited

Jun. 13th, 2017 10:47 pm
hollymath: (Default)
[personal profile] hollymath
This month's WI committee meeting wasn't quite the standard I've become used to. Most of us did stay for a drink after, but the conversation got around to politics and one of my favorite WI people turns out to have exactly the opinions about immigrants that the tabloids want her to: conflating them with refugees and asylum seekers, and generally thinking they're handed a much easier life than she has had.

We tried to tell her (I'm not the only immigrant sitting around this table, and the other one had actually worked with refugees and asylum seekers), but you can't reason somebody out of a position they didn't get into rationally.

Eventually someone had to leave to catch a bus and a bunch of the rest of us left too. I got home and had a hug from Andrew and made myself something easy to eat. But I'm still feeling rubbish.

You work so hard, and people are still going to think the group you're part of is the cause of all society's ills. And that it's somehow okay to tell you this when you're supposed to be out having a nice time (and planning for all the nice things we're going to do).

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-13 10:15 pm (UTC)
angelofthenorth: (Default)
From: [personal profile] angelofthenorth
*hugs* Not sure what else I can say...

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-13 11:47 pm (UTC)
jesse_the_k: Text: "backbutton > wank"  over left arrow icon with label "true story." (Back better than wank)
From: [personal profile] jesse_the_k
Shit.

"you can't reason somebody out of a position they didn't get into rationally" is an important insight.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-14 01:00 am (UTC)
sir_guinglain: (Default)
From: [personal profile] sir_guinglain
Years of whispers against people from other countries and those with different customs will do this; but I'm not telling you anything you didn't know, and there's even more to the story than this. Expressing what solidarity I can.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-14 07:50 am (UTC)
lilysea: Oracle 3 (Oracle: thoughful)
From: [personal profile] lilysea
I think the solidarity of people not directly affected by xenophobia is really important. It keeps it from looking like special pleading or "of course you would say that wouldn't you" if it's not just us immigrants staying these things.

Yeah, one of the things I find really dispiriting about Ableism is that I see so many of my friends post about [Social Justice and/or left wing political issues that don't directly affect them], but yet the only people I see posting about Disability issues are people who ARE Disabled... :(
Edited (clarity) Date: 2017-06-14 08:00 am (UTC)

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-14 08:25 am (UTC)
miss_s_b: (Default)
From: [personal profile] miss_s_b
*hugs for you and Holly*

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-14 09:55 am (UTC)
rmc28: Rachel smiling against background of trees, with newly-cut short hair (Default)
From: [personal profile] rmc28
I'm so sorry.

I have a work colleague who is clearly reflexively right wing and Leave-voting, and a bit prone to trotting out lines like "some people are just looking to get offended", when not trying to wind up the lifelong Labour activist on the other side of him.

I'm very consciously being the cheerful friendly disagreement-with-anecdotes person (rather than leaving it to e.g. the actual immigrant colleagues also in earshot), and keeping it all very friendly and low-key and in some ways it makes it easier that I don't actually like Mr Snowflakes-These-Days that much. It'd be much harder to be let down every day by someone I really liked and respected.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-14 01:20 pm (UTC)
sfred: (Default)
From: [personal profile] sfred
I'm sorry. <3

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-14 06:19 pm (UTC)
nanila: me (Default)
From: [personal profile] nanila
OH MAN so much sympathy. I had a horrible experience with a colleague at the meeting in Mallorca. He managed to be both sexist (about a female colleague) and racist (about Obama) in the space of thirty seconds. I walked out on the conversation.

He spent the next four days apologising every time he saw me, which in some ways made it worse, because by the next morning I was like, "Dude, I just want to enjoy everyone else's company, piss off and leave me alone."

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-14 08:59 pm (UTC)
forests_of_fire: A picture of a brilliantly colored waterfall cascading into a river (Default)
From: [personal profile] forests_of_fire
ugh. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that ugliness. -offers hugs-

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-15 01:00 pm (UTC)
mrs_leroy_brown: (Opus sigh)
From: [personal profile] mrs_leroy_brown
What I will never, ever understand is the refusal of some people to listen to / believe people's lived experiences. So much of this "nah you're lying/exaggerating" before the person's even finished speaking. Anything that doesn't fit their viewpoint can't be true, even when dozens, hundreds, thousands, millions are saying THIS IS HAPPENING TO ME.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-06-15 10:55 pm (UTC)
barakta: (Default)
From: [personal profile] barakta
Urgh sorry to hear about person, some people don't wanna hear it, but am glad others also argued on the right side and tried different convincing tactics. Still yuck tho.

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