Mar. 13th, 2019

hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
So last week I slept through my group-project class and one of the many consequences of that was that I wasn't reminded that the deadline for our literature review was Friday.

When I was doing extra work Thursday afternoon, in Salford at a PIP assessment, I got a message saying the other three were in a cafe on campus working on this thing and I could join them if I was free. I said I wasn't but it was only when they said they wanted to submit it that night that I realized it was due the next day, at noon. I was completely devoid of spoons by the time I got home (gosh it is nice writing something every day, because then with ongoing things I can get all "as you know..." with links and stuff). They woke me up at 2am with messages to the group, because they were still working on the paper.

But we already got the feedback today in class. My group got 65, which we're all pretty happy with. From what I overhead from the lecturer and tutor (who spent the second half of class going around talking to the small groups individually; they didn't get to ours though), this was graded really tough and apparently had started out tougher on the tutor's part. There were some sad faces around the room! So I'm relieved ours didn't have to be among them.

I had a moment of sheer panic too, when I went to TurnItIn to get the feedback and instead was greeted with a page that made it look like I hadn't submitted anything at all. That was the last thing I needed -- my confidence is still so shaken from that class I barely passed. But it turns out that this was due to A Computer Thing that also meant only some of us were getting marks and comments. I got neither, M got the feedback comments, and N got our mark. So if it wasn't for them I wouldn't know what'd happened! (Actually I think the 65 did turn up for me eventually, but the comments still haven't last time I checked; that's okay because we all looked at them on M's laptop.)

It was a huge relief to me that my group doesn't hate me, that we got a good grade, and now that I'm not panic-ridden in looking at it, I've skimmed our paper (yes the one I already handed in, shut up) and my contribution doesn't feel as woefully inadequate as it did. It's still not awesome but it's less bad than it looked at first.

It also got us one of the two green -- positive -- bits of feedback to go along with the million yellow ones that said things like "vague." I thought to look up and include something that actually got mentioned in the lecture today so I was proud of independently coming up with it. When N pointed out my bit of green, I said "I just went for quality over quantity," because I thought it'd make him laugh, and it did.

The relief was enough to exhaust me -- I'm running entirely on stress lately, so when it goes away I just flop. I've done some laundry, made a meal with vegetables in it, started making lists for packing for Lib Dem Conference at the weekend, but that's about it for the rest of the day except for lots of reading-for-fun. I had two big deadlines last week so I'm crashing a bit this week.

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hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
Holly

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