hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
1. Are we losing the art of listening?
Who's "we" and what does this mean? I am suspicious. It sounds like something an old white man would say when his emotional labor isn't getting done as invisibly as before.

I think "the art of listening," if it means anything at all, is something I expect and offer to my loved ones all the time. I am part of lots of conversations about feelings, mental illness, ugly stuff sometimes, in environments of care and concern. I try to remember the important things people tell me and they often remember what I've told them.

2. Have you ever interacted with the police?
Wow this seems like a question that could be very triggery and could get very different kinds of answers from people based on their race and disability status and stuff! I do like my Friday Fives to be a little safer for everyone. But anyway I only have very white-person answers here:

Twice after we'd been burgled. They were horrible to me one time (I heard the dispatcher tell them over the radio that I had depression so to be kind to me, and the one who'd been told this just looked at me and said I didn't look like I did (evne though I was still wearing a top that had sick on it, from the side effects of my first SSRI which I'd started if not that day then no more than a few days previous) but they were pretty nice to us the second time.

That time I called them to tell them my stolen bike had been spotted around the corner, along with a ton of other bikes, in a chop shop in somebody's front yard (I do live in a classy neighborhood don't I) when they said they wouldn't do anything because I didn't have the crime number -- I was out of my house and this was before smartphones, so I thought it was unreasonable to expect me to have it. I tried reporting the swapping of parts on clearly stolen bikes as its own crime but didn't get anywhere.

3. Do you like being alone?
No. The anxiety disorder has tempered the extroverted child/teenager I was, to some degree, but being around the right people is so much better than being around no people. Being around the other people or too many people can be so draining, though.

4. Who would you share your passwords with?
Andrew, probably. We share them for things like Netflix and the bank account anyway (though I usually make him do online stuff because I'm too lazy to remember them properly).

5. What are you grateful for today?
My group's essay got handed in on time, despite me only writing 5% of the words. I couldn't sleep last night for stressing that they'd hate me and the second half of the semester working with the same group would be miserable, but I messaged them to apologize this morning and one wrote back that it was okay and they hadn't communicated their plans for working on it very well and they want to get better at communicating and meeting up more often for the second half of the project.

It was a huge relief, so much so that I'm crashing hard now from all the stress trying to leave my body.
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
1. What size (twin, full, etc.) is your bed?

2. How many pillows do you sleep with?
One or two.

3. Do you have a weighted blanket? If so, does it help you?
I haven't tried one but I'd really like to because it sounds like it would be good for me. Sometimes Gary sits on top of the blanket while I'm sleeping which has a similar albeit inconvenient effect! He doesn't (usually) sit on my legs but next to them in a way that puts a little pressure on the part of the blanket next to me and that's so is soothing.

4. Do you sleep with any stuffed animals?
I used to -- I've got Mark the Shark from the Sea Life Centre ([personal profile] mother_bones bought me and her matching ones, though hers isn't called Mark) and Ruaraidh (a dog I won in a Lib Dem raffle, named Ruaraidh because some of the Young Liberals believed the stuffed dog looked like of of them who's called Ruaraidh.

It was really cute when Andrew would come to bed and address them by name and take them out of the bed so he could get in it. He was nice to them.

I liked them for having something to cuddle when I went to bed alone. I only stopped because now I have a real dog. He's even better because he's warm and cute and the best dog in the world, but he does wake me up by jumping on my feet sometimes, or trying to get under the same bit of blanket he is standing on.

5. Do you have to have the TV on to go to sleep?
I don't have a TV. I do like to listen to an audiobook or a radio play when I go to sleep. If it's just me, I'll put on a Terry Pratchett book or one of a few old favorites. If Andrew's going to sleep too, it has to be Old Harry's Game or particular Big Finish Doctor Who stories or one of a couple other specific things.
hollymath: Postmark on a letter from Minnesota, like me. (postmark)
The headache that sent me to bed around 7 last night (though I didn't sleep until after 9) was still so bad this morning that after twenty minutes of psyching myself up to get dressed for work, I nearly fell over when I tried to stand up.

I feel a little better after food, large amounts of caffeine, and ibuprofen, but it took me an hour to bootstrap myself out of bed to obtain them.

And now at least I'm sitting at the computer near all my notes and stuff for my typology exam tomorrow?

But in the meantime, a meme that's doing the rounds like this is old-skool LJ. I approve.

questions and answers )
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
1. What did you do in 2018 that you'd never done before?:
Spoke at Lib Dem Conference. Saw Hamilton twice!

+49 )
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
When I saw this week's Friday Five questions. I was excited because they seemed so relevant and interesting to me for once.

Then I noticed they were written by [personal profile] jesse_the_k, so I really shouldn't have been surprised that I thought they were great!

1. Do you like to reply to every comment in your journal?
I like to reply generally, but not to every single comment. They don't all need or even suit a reply.

2. What type of post gets the most/least responses in your journal?
Big stuff gets the most: depression, disability stuff, asking for help... that bra/gender post amazed and delighted me with the quality and breadth of its comments on everything from dysphoria to laundry. Love you guys.

As for what gets the least? Boring day-to-day stuff, and things where even I'm not sure what I'm talking about! In the old days of LJ, an entry with no comments seemed the height of pointlessness, but I don't mind now.

3. What do you do when a new person first comments in your journal?
Usually panic that I've probably written a bunch of silly or boring things lately and what must they think of me. Ha. (Actually, that's more for when someone subscribes to my journal, but that's usually when they start commenting too.)

4. When you're reading someone else's journal, do you read every comment before adding your own?
Sometimes. If I think someone might've said what I was gonna say, I check for that. (Unless I was gonna say "<3" or "hugs" or something because I don't think repetition there is a bad thing.)

5. When is "too late" to reply to an entry?
Never! You can reply to stuff I wrote years ago if you want.

I do still have comments on the aforementioned bras/genders entry that I want to reply to but haven't gotten around to yet and now I feel a little stressed or sad that it's "too late" so I guess I am inconsistent here.
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (me)
I spent the last few days mostly away from the internet (literally with no signal a lot of the time), setting up for a wedding reception in a field, enjoying the day, and tidying up after it today.

There was a lot of stress on the Friday, thanks to a ridiculously prolonged journey because of the standstill on the M6 and how catastrophically lost we got, twice, trying to make it to our hotel. It'd have been enough to make most days The Worst Day Ever but when we finally did get back to the hotel we agreed it had still been a great day; that's how good the rest of it was.

Between Friday evening and this afternoon, I:
  • helped put together marquees (and took half of one down by myself)
  • went barefoot in grass
  • lugged hay bales around for the first time since I was a teenager (and for a very different purpose! they were being used as furniture here)
  • saw a marvelous read-through of A Midsummer Night's Dream
  • heard a prayer in old English in the church service! (the text, and modern translation, of which can be seen in the comments here)
  • had Richard Coles shake my hand and fairly convincingly say he was glad I was there (a very important quality in a vicar!)
  • very briefly held the distance record in the welly-wanging game, which is extra impressive considering the shoes I had to do it in
  • laughed at a bunch of other people welly-wanging, umbrella-fencing, and egg-and-spoon racing (something about doing these games in our fancy wedding outfits made them even funnier)
  • saw some of my favorite people, including some I didn't know were going to be there, and some new friends I made over the weekend.


May. 25th, 2018 11:55 pm
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
It feels like I didn't do anything today. I woke up this morning with the headache I went to bed with, and it was raining outside. Normally not one to lie awake in bed, I let the dog upstairs and went back to bed, snuggled between dog and husband.

I did get out of bed eventually, but I still played a lot of mindless games on my phone, listened to a lot of cricket, and went back to bed for so long that Andrew thought I was having a nap but I was just...watching Frasier, or listening to cricket, or just not doing anything.

But actually I did a bunch of stuff!
  • Arranged my laptop to be ready to go when a courier got here to swap it with the loaner one so it can actually have some hope of fixing the assistive software on it.
  • Washed all the dishes.
  • Made food with vegetables and protein in it.
  • Arranged for one of [personal profile] mother_bones's boys to get the Ikea stuff I wanted, on Sunday. He's just going to go to Ikea and get the stuff and bring it here! I don't have to go to Ikea at all! And he loves it apparently so I don't have to feel too bad about this.
  • Remembered to update my card details so I can continue getting my veg box after the old card expires at the end of the month.
  • Figured out how to work the wireless bit of my wireless printer! It's actually easier to print things from my phone than the loaner laptop, which seems perverse. The printer still thinks after every page or two that there's no paper, so you have to sit on the floor with it (it's on the floor because the desk is too small because the house is too small so there's nowhere else to put it) and babysit it. I swear it took me longer to print Andrew's tax return than it took him to fill it out, and in the process I also learned how to take apart the back of the printer to fix a paper jam, but it's done!
  • Skyped my parents, who are at my not-really-but-called-that aunt and uncle's, people I love but rarely see because they live so far away. It was nice to see their faces for maybe the first time since my wedding.
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
1. Have you ever driven an electric car?

2. Do you live in an area that is prone to tornadoes?
Not any more. But my dad helped build the house my parents still live in, and that I did until I moved out, after a tornado damaged the one he'd grown up in.

3. How many closets does your house have?
None, I really miss them. But there's not enough room in houses here to devote corners of it to that kind of thing. I have freestanding wardrobes left here by the people who'd had this house before (and really I see why; I want something different).

+30 )
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
I've seen a bunch of my friends do this and thought it might be fun.
Did you have a cell phone prior to your thirties? I think I even had a smartphone before my thirties, though only just if I did.
Did they exist? Before my thirties?! I turned 30 in 2011, just saying.
Did you have cable when you were a little kid? You can't get cable where my parents live; we had to wait for satellite TV to become a thing. They got that...I think when I was in high school, but not long before I left. Only time I lived in a house with it; I only had a TV for a year or two of college and could never afford cable. And I haven't had a TV since then
Do you know what 8-track tapes are? Yes. My dad had an 8-track player in the basement and my brother and I liked a few of them so we'd play Simon & Garfunkel, the Beach Boys, Bob Dylan, stuff like that.
How about cassette tapes? Do I know what they are? Yes. I started recording my dad's records (with his help of course) onto tapes with my little Fischer Price cassette player when I was about three, and I didn't have CDs until I was in high school, so the time in between was filled with a love of music and thus dozens of cassette tapes.
When did you get your first DVD player? Second year of college. I only had money afterwards to buy two DVDs, so for a while my collection consisted of Shrek and Memento. I still have that Shrek DVD, though the Memento one was stolen by a later roommate who insisted it was hers when it was definitely mine.
Did you learn to type on a typewriter? I played on my grandma's typewriter but I learned to type in a combination of classes in fourth grade (on computers known as "IBM-compatibles" and we were told to call it keyboarding instead of typing).

Oh and I learned a little on this weird Pre-Computer thing which I got because one year when I went to see Santa you were sent home with a letter saying "I'll sure try to get you a [whatever you asked for] kid!" so that your parents knew what you'd said. Only I got must've someone else's letter who'd asked for a computer. I don't remember what it was I'd actually asked for but I never had any interest in computers. This thing did teach me a little BASIC, though, as well as a start on typing.
What was the first computer you owned? My parents sent me away to college with a laptop; I think it was a Compaq? I remember nothing about it really.
What age were you when you first got e-mail? Eighteen, because I got it when I started college. I still remember my e-mail address; it was the first four letters of your last name and then a four-digit number that I think was sequential. I actually recognized someone's LJ screen name as being in this format a couple years later and he also went to the University of Minnesota.
Was the Internet around when you were a kid? Well, yes it existed but not in a way anyone knew about. The internet was a thing that happened to me a very little in high school, mostly at school (my mom didn't want it at home because she thought it was evil) and which I mostly found really dull. We had to pass some kind of test to get a "Internet Driver's License" when I was about 15 and I was like "Can I not take the test if I don't intend to ever use the internet?" and the teacher who was telling us about it was so baffled at that question; I don't think she'd ever been asked that.
What age were you when Facebook, Twitter, Livejournal, and Dreamwidth started? I don't even know when they started but I started them...let's see, this Facebook account goes back to 2013 but I had one before that, managed to delete it and then got sucked back in by volunteering. Twitter I also had and deleted a couple of times; I think this iteration dates from 2015. LiveJournal I started in 2002, Dreamwidth I started in 2009 and used exclusively since 2016.
What was the first printer you owned like? It'd have been an inkjet (they all have), but otherwise I have no idea. I don't care about printers. I can only tell you what kind I have now because I finally tore down the box for it a few days ago.
Collegiate papers: typewriter or computer? Computer. But they still had to be printed out and handed in. I remember frantically e-mailing a prof to beg them to accept an e-mailed version because for whatever reason I couldn't get it to them by hand.
How old were you when streaming came into being? ...I don't know. What kind of streaming? I think RealPlayer is the first such thing I can think of, and I'm pretty sure I was in college by then though if it was a thing in high school I wouldn't have known about it (we had 56k dial-up internet at my parents until about six years ago).
What age were you when you got your first MP3 player? My parents bought me a minidisc player the first time I asked for an MP3 player for Christmas, and that was when I was in college, so it must've been early twenties? Actually I wonder if the first one I had was when I was living in Didsbury and working in Stockport; I had a tiny cheap one with really wonky controls, you couldn't always tell what song you were going to get if you tried to do something advanced like change the volume. It was my coping mechanism for the bus rides, especially going home in the dark almost alone. I fell in love with the Hold Steady via Separation Sunday by listening to it on that thing.
Did you own a record player, cassette player, CD player, or MP3 player as a teen? I didn't own a record player but there was one in the house -- maybe even two for part of that time. I had lots of walkmans and boom boxes and I did get my first CD player as a teen. Not MP
At what age did you start blogging on the Internet? Twenty.
What age were you when the e-readers came out? I don't know when they came out, but I remember Andrew got one when we were living in our old flat (so between 2009 and 2014) because it was an early one that had a whole keyboard and could play music and stuff and he was so excited about it he said he loved it almost as much as he did me. The only time in my life I've ever heard him compare anything so favorably.
How do you listen to music? Mostly on Spotify, either on my computer or my phone. Sometimes I still listen to 6music on my DAB. Mostly I don't listen to a lot of music; Andrew's usually got it playing if he's awake and when he's not I'm happy with the silence. Or else I play podcasts or audiobooks. But I do like music for when I'm writing (I just play random ambient music on Spotify then) or sometimes if I'm struggling to get things done: chores, getting out of the house, whatever.
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
  • e-mails
  • chores I have to do
  • homework
  • most things Andrew says to me
  • anything my lecturers say
  • most things my tutors say
  • anything on my Netflix or Amazon queues, or anything else on Netflix or Prime for that matter
  • podcasts, even my favorite ones
  • any book I've tried to read (audio, e, or regular)
  • even Terry Pratchett books
That's the most worrying one. That never happens!

I don't know what's wrong with me, but I hope it stops soon.

Best day

Feb. 14th, 2018 10:43 am
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
When the mail arrived today, we had:
  • My February whisky from Whisky-Me, a Christmas gift that really does keep giving the whole year.
  • an unsigned valentine! typed address and everything! I showed it to Andrew who looked over it, slightly baffled, just as I had
    He noticed the postmark was from Guernsey. "Do you know anyone from Guernsey?" he asked. I don't. "Do you know anyone who was going on holiday in Guernsey?" Not as far as I know, I laughed.
  • a letter for Andrew from the Student Loan Company. Saying they owe him money. "I bet its two pounds," I said. He thought maybe twenty or something. There was a number to ring, so he was going to call them while I took the dog for a walk. When I came back in, he was on hold and told me how much it was and...it's a lot. Easily a month's worth of mortgage and bills. "Remember all those times they called me and I kept hanging up on them?" he said. "This is what they were trying to tell me!" I shall be using this for a long time as an example of why it's better to face things you think are scary than to run away from them!
And, sad as I am that my Arabic teacher is ill today, I'm delighted it means I have only one lecture today instead of six hours in university trying to cram more knowledge into my head than is likely to fit at the moment.
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
1. Where did you go the last time you took an airplane ride?
Taking an airplane ride sounds like something you do at the fair, heh.

But, the last plane I was in brought me to Manchester. Otherwise, how would I have gotten here?

2. Are you a nervous flyer or a comfortable flyer?
I'm fine flying but I hate airports. I'll have an anxiety attack for sure, and panic attacks aren't uncommon. There's just so much that can go wrong. It's always a relief for me to actually sit down on a plane! It means there's an hour or several where I don't have to catastrophize or do anything more strenuous than pick a movie to watch.

3. Window seat or aisle seat?
I hardly ever get either. If I'm flying with Andrew he gets the aisle seat and I am usually sitting in the middle next to a stranger. On my own I sometimes have an aisle seat and sometimes one in the middle, but I don't mind much either way.

4. What is the worst experience you've had flying?
That time we got stuck in Paris, we missed our flight and it looked like it might not be possible for us to get anywhere in the continental U.S. until Christmas Eve at the earliest. They lost our bags, I spent five hours queuing, we got the wrong shuttle bus to our hotel, Andrew just sat on the floor and cried at one point because he was so exhausted.

That was my thirtieth birthday! Glad I won't have another one.

5. What is the best experience you've had flying?
They're all much of a muchness. One time on Air France they handed out free cognac after the meal. Last time the flight attendant was super supportive, having seen me get in the plane with a white cane. That kind of thing is about all I have for awesomeness about flying!

End of 2017

Jan. 2nd, 2018 12:07 pm
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
1. What did you do in 2017 that you'd never done before?:
Became a UK citizen and a student at the University of Manchester.
Read more... )

Good day

Jul. 9th, 2017 09:54 pm
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
  • Spent half the night awake, but still managed to get up when my alarm went off to go to yoga. (I've been trying to go either Wednesday evening or Sunday morning or both. I did neither last week but both this week. And when I got there I found that it was my usual teacher's first time back after a twelve-day holiday, which means the sessions I missed last week would've been taught by the person I had on Wednesday night who was...perfectly nice but not so well suited to me as this guy is. So then I felt less bad about being unable to go last week.)
  • Was so hungry I ate breakfast even though I was going out for brunch with friends, which ended up being very useful because our food got hugely delayed.
  • Food was very good when it turned up, including my hummus and spiced cashew salad that [personal profile] haggis was rightly FOMO about (I ordered it from a page that was missing from her menu!) but luckily she was still happy with the food she did order.
  • Went for a nice walk in the sunshine, through Stretford and along the Bridgewater canal, which made me happy to be near water again, something my Minnesota upbringing has taught me to always expect to be near to.
  • Talked to parents back from their vacation Up North: fishing and swimming and campfires. And my family being their usual selves. My grandma went and had a nice time, which is good because she hasn't been going every year lately. My cousin's kid, now seven, still asks about me even though she hasn't seen me in two years bremembers me because no one else will go kayaking or swimming or caterpillar-finding with her like I did then.
  • We actually went near a place on the canal today where you can go kayaking, I guess. Me and Katie are talking about trying it sometime. I'd love to, I really miss being on the water.
  • And I did a job application for a LGBT charity, with help from Andrew on getting through the person spec. I always lose the will to live before I get halfway through, and he's genuinely convinced that I am as great as he's saying I am so it works out really well. I should remember to exploit him for this more often!
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
Having one of those "I'm not doing anything" days because I slept or lazed around all morning.

But since then I've
  • gone to WI craft group where I learned a whole new kind of craft (book folding)
  • a bit of Lib Demmery, including inviting a new Lib Dem to local #libdempint, passing on important e-mails to the people who can do things about them, and agreeing to go to a meeting in a few days
  • e-mailed Metrolink & Northern to try to set up a meeting about how inaccessible Manchester Victoria is (as leader of the VI Steering Group)
  • e-mailed the council guy and the RNIB about the taser thing
  • printed off stuff I need for my book
  • did an update (accidentally two updates) for my Kickstarter backers. The previous update hadn't worked (not surprising when these two nearly didn't either) so the poor fuckers hadn't heard from me since June!
  • ordered new printer ink when I didn't have enough to print off what I needed
I think I still have to convince myself it is okay not to go to yoga tonight. I keep forgetting I have a yoga mat of my own now so I might do a bit here but I think I am still too sinus-infected to go to the class I usually do.

Yoga class

Jan. 24th, 2017 12:08 am
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
Here are the things I have learned from three weeks of yoga classes on a Monday evening:
  1. Bring a bottle of water next time. You meant to do that last week, and forgot until you got there and saw someone with one this week. You get more thirsty than you think.
  2. Don't wear the green leggings again. They're in danger of falling down.
  3. You really like yoga even though you worry it's taking an approach to life with a long, complex history and making it into appropriative exercise for white people.
  4. It is okay that you're the only person in the class who can't do a shoulder stand. It's okay that you could do one last week and not this week. You have been reassured that the version you can do (basically, a bridge up against a wall) is just as good. It would help if you believed this but it's something that you know is true and that this is what you'd say to anyone else in your (ha) position.
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
So many things are bad right now, I need to remind myself of, and celebrate, the ones that are going well.

I've been to the gym three times in the last week.

I've just about kept up with dishes and laundry.

I did well enough at discharging my duties as VI Steering Group leader that I don't think anyone is disappointed in me yet and we have good, ambitious ideas for the future.

I re-connected with a volunteer at MOSI and have been nudged to get my volunteering there going again.

I've re-ordered my and Andrew's meds before they've run out. I've also made myself a doctor's appointment because I'm aware my mental health has taken a severe nose-dive in the last week.

I've been sort of capable of ignoring social media and reading books instead.

I got a present to my mom in time for her birthday that she really liked -- she said it brought a tear to her eye. I also made a present for [personal profile] mother_bones in time for her birthday and she said she really liked it too.

I've done some planning in hopes of being on the WI committee for next year, focusing on accessibility and member welfare.

I started a facebook group for white people who want to leverage privilege to help the world be less horrible but aren't sure how to do it.
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
By which I mean "boring to people who aren't me," not "disagreed with"!

  • the "Habitable Zone"
  • whether Curiosity (Mars rover) singing "happy birthday" to itself is sad
  • everything that's wrong with this, since it's a tab I still have open and it irks me more every time I remember it
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
By 12:30 this afternoon, I had...
  • gotten out of bed very early (around eight), feeling relatively rested (though my "relative" baselne here is not good right now)
  • did laundry and hung it outside (hooray for sunshine!)
  • walked the dog
  • remembered to take my meds
  • took recycling out, took bins out, and put them back when they were empty
  • wrote a little version of my "migrant story" for this website
  • texted a friend to make plans to get together this week
  • ordered a massive, overdue online grocery shop, which will be here tomorrow afternoon
  • typed up my shitty longhand notes from the LGBT+ Lib Dems conference I was at recently and sent them off
  • went with Andrew to a GP appointment
  • ordered new prescriptions for Andrew and I before we've even run out of the existing ones (though it'll be close, for me!)
  • ate reasonably well/appropriately
And yet I feel like I've done nothing, everything is overwhelming and crushing me.
hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)
  1. It is possible for me to throw something in the "nah, pass it along to someone else" pile for no other reason than this looks far too much like something my ex-girlfriend wore. Seriously. If she were local, she'd be the person I offered that skirt to next.
  2. I personally disapprove of shapewear, both on philosophical grounds -- I've been a lot healthier and happier since I stopped believing that this shape for my body would be better than that one -- and practical grounds -- wearing stuff that squeezes my thighs and hips into a different shape fucking hurts -- but the shapewear of someone a little bit bigger than me? Makes perfect cycling shorts (or wear-under-dresses-that-might-make-my-legs-rub-together-too-much shorts) for me. I don't care if they do have lace at the bottoms of the legs; they're not underwear any more, they're totally shorts.***
* By informal I mean since I was helping them move anyway, [personal profile] mother_bones had a bunch of clothes I could take away, either hers or her boyfriend's wife's. I look forward to wearing something when I next see my family that they compliment me on (which they will, because these clothes look great) and asking me where I got it so I can say, "from my Platonic Wife's boyfriend's wife. Actual wife, in that case."

** By swap I mean I didn't offer any clothes, only take them away. Though having tried them all on this morning, I do have a bunch that I will pass along because they don't suit me.

*** Especially handy since I'm helping [personal profile] mother_bones et al. move to such a great distance away that I might start cycling there! People who I'm used to having within ten-minutes of walking distance will now be in ten minutes' cycling distance. I've been so spoiled having them so nearby...


hollymath: Selfie: white person, three-quarter profile, smiling, brown hair shaved on the side we can see, chin-length on the other (Default)

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